Make LOVE, not fuck

by

“I JUST WANT YOU TO FUCK ME !!! ”, she said

Do you make love or just fuck ?

In 2014, I attended a Tantra workshop in Thailand.

During the break, a beautiful European woman came to me, and said, “I love how masculine you are. I don’t want all this spiritual bullshit, I just want you to fuck me”.

So at the lunch break we went to her place.

She was horny and after a few minutes, I was inside her.

Very soon, she complained, “Fuck me harder, I don’t want this softness, just FUCK ME! ”.

But i didn’t fuck her.
Rather, I made love with her as I usually did – I moved inside her softly, I kissed her, looked in her eyes, kissed her small un-loved breasts, caressed her, and whispered in her ears.

And after a few minutes, she broke down and cried.
Men always fucked her.
No one ever made love with her like that.

A few days later she had her first orgasm with me and we dated for a while.

You see, women will often ask or demand to be fucked hard, and men will comply, for a few reasons:

  • Because they watched porn and had sex with guys that watched porn, so that way of intercourse is all they’ve every known
  • Because they can’t feel subtle sensations and need friction and intensity to feel pleasure
  • Because they are seeking confirmation for their low self-worth, and being objectified, satisfies that need
  • Because the intimacy and emotions that comes from slow, soft, meaningful love making are challenging to contain
  • Because they yearn to surrender, and wrongly believe that being fucked will help

And it’s not just about the act.

The words you use (or even think with) create and shape your reality.

The word “Fuck” doesn’t have a good connotation. Some of its meanings are “To take advantage of, betray, or cheat”, “To act wastefully or foolishly” or “To tease or treat someone carelessly or indifferently”.

Instead of “fucking”, you can “have sex”, or my favorite “Make Love”.

Your intention should be to manifest love, witness love, expand love, share love, channel love.
Your words and actions should be loving.
Every moment, every touch, every movement, should be an expression of love.

While it’s beautiful to yearn to surrender, the way there is not through fucking but through melting in love, together.

It’s natural to yearn for intensity, but instead of friction and force, that intensity can come from strong emotions and from generating AND circulating sexual energy.

If you want intensity, don’t lose your sexual energy. As a man, learn to control your ejaculation and enjoy non-ejaculatory pleasure and orgasm. As a woman, learn to avoid explosive orgasms and instead cultivate your whole-body multiple orgasms. As a couple, learn how to touch and share intimacy in a way that deepens orgasmic energy.

I hear you say “Eyal, what if i just want a fun quickie?”
Well you can have it, and it can be loving, harmonious and respectful. A quick love-making session will recharge and satisfy you more than a quick act of mindless fucking.

If you resonate with this message of love, you would LOVE my free 2-hour video program “Awakening Female Pleasure” – Click here to join.

Make love, not fuck,

Eyal.