Clit orgasms are fun, but they are only one kind of orgasm. Vaginal and the other 20(!) kinds of orgasms are not just longer and stronger, they also feel different – physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Think back to the last time you masturbated. Let’s assume it was one of those times that you were mainly focused on stimulating your clit. Now ask yourself this:

• After the orgasm, was your clit hypersensitive? Was it even uncomfortable or unbearable to touch? 
• If you had the time to continue pleasuring yourself, why did you stop?
• Even though you experienced pleasure and release, did you feel deeply satisfied?

Let’s generalize for a moment and see if the following description is similar to your experience of a clitoral orgasm:

First of all, to orgasm in this way there needs to be some kind of effort. A clitoral orgasm is then most likely to manifest as an intense, short and sharp peak. The build-up is usually fairly quick – some women can reach a clitoral orgasm in a minute or two – and the orgasm itself is brief, lasting for about twenty to thirty seconds. The pleasure sensations and the orgasm are mostly focused in the genital area.

During or immediately after the peak of the orgasm, the clitoris becomes hypersensitive and any touch feels irritating or ‘too much.’ It might feel annoying, uncomfortable or maybe even painful. Perhaps you have found yourself saying something like this to your partner: ‘Lay off my clit, now.’ If your clit becomes hypersensitive, you probably had a clitoral orgasm – this is the best way to differentiate between a clitoral and other orgasms. The clitoral orgasm is followed by a quick decline in pleasure, arousal and interest in further stimulation. Some women need to wait a few minutes or sometimes longer before they are ready for more clitoral touch, or for another clitoral orgasm.

 If your clit becomes hypersensitive, you probably had a clitoral orgasm

If you are with a partner, the orgasm will feel like ‘my orgasm’ rather than an ongoing and shared state. You might lose interest in some way, still loving your partner, but somewhat less interested to share with them in that moment compared to how you felt just a moment ago, before the orgasm. Note, this is similar to how a man feels after an ejaculation. There is some satisfaction in the release of energy, but it’s more like the goal’s been achieved or you’ve ticked the orgasm box. Then it’s on to the next thing. 

A note about anatomy: Most people understand the clitoris to be the small pea-shaped part of the vulva, tucked under the clitoral hood and above the urethra and vaginal opening. There is research that shows that this is just the tip; the clitoris actually extends throughout the female genitalia and envelopes the vagina. Subsequently, there are theories that say there is only one kind of orgasm – a clitoral orgasm. However, my experience, as well as the experience of my teachers and colleagues, shows a better picture: whatever the underlying anatomy, an orgasm reached through direct stimulation of the external clit feels very different to a vaginal or whole-body orgasm. Let’s look at these differences. 

Clitoral orgasms are just the beginning

Many young girls first experience orgasm through masturbation. They might use the shower head or touch their genitals with their hands or rub up against a toy or a pillow, which stimulates their clitoris and can result in an orgasm. As they grow up, many women continue to focus on their clit even when they begin to explore penetrative sex.

‘The only drawback to masturbation is that I can reach climax so quickly – and then it’s a major letdown.’

Let’s be clear here, clitoral orgasms are not a bad thing. There isn’t anything wrong with them or with you enjoying them. That being said, what I do invite you to consider are these questions:

• If there are so many other types of pleasure and orgasm states, why would you only want to have clitoral orgasms?
• Would you like to be able to choose what type of orgasm or orgasmic state you feel like experiencing?
• What if clitoral orgasms have some side effects that don’t always serve you?

Clitoral orgasms don’t really offer a lasting and deep level of satisfaction. Some women have said they even feel hollow, depleted, dull, unfulfilled, frustrated or even slightly depressed after this type of orgasm. Perhaps you have experienced some of these effects. But why is the orgasm so short and sharp? Why does your clit feel pleasurable one moment and then unpleasant to touch the next? Why do you sometimes feel depleted, unsatisfied or even frustrated afterwards?

Explosive orgasms – not what you thought they were

A clitoral orgasm is an explosive orgasm because the accumulated sexual energy is exploded downwards, out of your body. In brief, during an explosive clitoral orgasm you lose energy, while in other kinds of orgasms you can retain and circulate that energy. 

The ancient science of Tantra offers an interesting explanation for this kind of energy. It suggests that the energy is accumulated in the genital area during sexual stimulation, and specifically in the second (sacral) chakra. So the pleasure will be perceived mostly in the genital or pelvic area. Stimulating the clitoris causes the energy to be volatile and creates a downward flow of energy. It might feel ‘sharp’ or ‘heavy,’ ‘stagnant’ or ‘sticky.’

When you orgasm by rubbing your clit, you lose the energy that you just created during stimulation. This loss of energy is what creates the hypersensitivity of the clitoris and is why some women feel a bit depleted or might take some time before they can orgasm again. It’s also why you might feel unsatisfied on a deeper level.

‘I feel that I definitely got slightly addicted to clitoral orgasms and would turn to that as a form of release (especially after internal stimulation didn’t cause me to orgasm). I am now quite strict about not resorting to this as I do feel that it makes me more moody and up-and-down emotionally.’

Furthermore, sexual energy is life-force energy – it’s part of what makes you healthier, more independent, creative and successful. When you have frequent clitoral orgasms of the kind described earlier, your energy is drained and you are deprived of that power source. Your body has been ‘trained’ to release and expel energy instead of retaining and circulating it.

A clitoral orgasm is usually a peak orgasm and similar to a man’s ejaculatory orgasm. A man’s ejaculatory orgasm is also an explosive orgasm because his sexual energy is released and expelled from his body in the form of sperm. A man will become aroused quickly, his orgasm is brief (even shorter than a woman’s clitoral orgasm) and he immediately enters the refractory period. He loses his erection and also loses at least some interest in continuing to engage with his partner. Have you noticed that men don’t just lose their erection but also their arousal, their presence and their connection with you? Falling asleep is not uncommon here. I’m sure you have experienced this! A woman’s energy does a similar thing after a clitoral orgasm.

‘I agree that external clitoral-only orgasms do leave me feeling depleted.’

Let’s visualize it this way: Think of a pressure cooker. It’s much faster to cook something in a pressure cooker because of the intense pressure and heat locked inside the pot. It’s a kind of energy, like your sexual energy. Now imagine the pressure cooker is faulty and that once the pressure is built, the lid flies off. All of the steam discharges and the contents of the pot spill everywhere. That’s kind of what happens with an explosive orgasm.

But imagine cooking a delicious soup in your pressure cooker where, instead, you keep the lid on even once the soup is cooked. It will stay hot and ready for hours after you turn the heat off.

‘I have only had explosive clitoral orgasms and was always left feeling like I was missing something.’

An important note here: If you never had a clitoral orgasm, you can try to have one now, just to see how it feels. Get into the shower and use the shower head to stimulate your clit. Play. Explore. Try different temperatures, water jet settings, angles, distance from your body, or positions. Stimulate directly on your clit and around her. For many women, this usually works. Notice how you’re feeling during and after you orgasm. If you don’t orgasm, that’s fine, keep reading and try the next practices.

There is another kind of orgasm – Vaginal

If you thought clitoral orgasms were fun, you’re in for a treat! 

A vaginal orgasm is very different. Rather than using clitoral stimulation, a vaginal orgasm is usually experienced by stimulating the G-spot, the walls of the vagina and the cervix (the entrance to the womb). In comparison to an explosive clitoral orgasm, an orgasm that comes from vaginal stimulation is usually an implosive orgasm. The sexual energy is imploded, retained and then circulated within your body. These orgasms can last for long minutes and even hours, because as long as you are retaining your energy, you are able to use it to orgasm again.

This kind of orgasm is attained and experienced as a type of ‘releasing,’ ‘allowing,’ ‘letting go’ and ‘surrendering.’ Compared to a clitoral orgasm, which is often experienced as a kind of ‘effort,’ ‘trying’ or ‘grasping’ – the vaginal orgasm is felt as deep satisfaction and relaxation.

You’ll know when you have a vaginal orgasm because it feels totally different. The build-up is slower; it takes longer to get aroused and you’ll need more time for stimulating your whole body and then your vagina. Some women need up to an hour of foreplay and penetration before they orgasm in this way. The orgasm itself also unfolds slower and lasts longer (sometimes much, much longer). During and after this orgasm, you can continue to receive stimulation and the clitoris doesn’t become oversensitive. Another orgasm is possible within minutes or even seconds.

If we are thinking about the landscape of an orgasm, this one feels like a ‘hill’ rather than a ‘peak.’ The pleasure feels more intense because it is deeper and fuller; it’s expansive, all-encompassing and meaningful. Even though the stimulation might originate in the genital area, the pleasure often emanates and spreads in waves throughout the whole body. This usually moves towards the upper areas of the body but also downwards, hence the term ‘toe-curling orgasm.’

But it’s not just about pleasure and orgasm. The surrender into a vaginal orgasm feels meaningful and special. You may feel greater love and connection – with yourself, your partner, your life and sometimes with the universe. 

You will probably need to feel trust and connection with the person you’re with to orgasm in this way. If you are with a partner, your orgasm will feel like ‘our orgasm’ instead of ‘my orgasm.’ It’s like a gift you want to share, not an achievement you want to keep.

During the hours and days following a deep vaginal orgasm, you might sometimes feel echoes of that orgasm in the form of vibrations, pulsations, sustained pleasure in your body or feelings of love and bliss.

And there’s even more.

While clitoral orgasms can deplete your life-force energy and your ability to be creative, vaginal orgasms empower you as a woman. They charge your body, spark your creativity, fuel your confidence and can inspire success in your career. This kind of orgasm is nourishing for your body and soul. And, at its best, it connects you to your own feminine essence, to your partner, to others and to life.

Women who experience deep vaginal orgasms usually prefer them to clitoral orgasms, because they feel better – physically, emotionally, energetically and spiritually.

‘I have been practicing implosive orgasms and I’m surprised at how easy it is. I always thought I wouldn’t manage so I just put up with clitoral orgasms. But I have to say, implosive orgasms are much more satisfying and now I feel like having sex every day. At the moment I just practice with myself but that’s okay … I’m still happy!’

Unfortunately, most women and men have been led to believe that the clitoris is the only sensitive area in a woman’s body and that clitoral stimulation is necessary to achieve orgasm. The clitoris is easy to find, easy to arouse and easy to orgasm from. So it’s been clit, clit, clit, clit, clit, clit and more clit. In comparison, experiencing a vaginal orgasm is a bit more challenging. It takes much more openness, willingness and surrender on the part of the woman. It also requires patience, know-how and persistence on the part of her partner.

‘I’m experiencing the difference between a clitoral orgasm and a longer, intense, deeper internal orgasm. The level and type of energy is different and during the days after, I still have this nice sexual, female energy in and around me. So good!’ 

The clitoris is a natural, beautiful, and sacred part of a woman’s body and sexuality. But it’s not the only part. There is a vast, uncharted, blissful world in there – in your vagina – waiting to be explored and yearning to be honored, celebrated and unleashed!

So, what if you could receive prolonged clitoral stimulation, enjoy those sensations, and then turn them into meaningful and empowering states of whole-body orgasm? Would you be interested in trying?

This is included in my book “Orgasm Unleashed – Your guide to pleasure, healing, and power” – Sign up to read a free 50 pages sample. You will also get the “How to turn clit stimulation into internal orgasms” step-by-step guide.